Let her play .....

                      

     

    I miss the soft pitter patter of feet on the floor in the morning, the countless hours of playing barbies and babies, sewing for hours for A life of Faith , setting up Barbie and doll houses ... Playing for hours and most of all planning and having tea!

        My girls are teens now and for the most part these days have ended ....'now don't take me wrong we have plenty of fun now, in just a different way !

    Being a Mom is the third best gift God could have ever given to me ... My #1 gift is salvation and my #2 is my sweet hubby! Being a Mom has brought so much joy to my life! I actually can not wait till the time  to be lil granny in real life you know 50yrs down the road! Hehe.....

      For want ever reason I woke up this morning and this thought was so strongly on my heart ..... It was Imporant you taught them to Play and even more Imporant to teach the Boundries .... 

    That very moment I felt like God said you weren't a bad Mom when everyone else was putting there dolls away and trading them in at 10 for make-up and cell phones .... Instead I insisted cell phones waited till 14-15 and make- up no earlier than 13...

       I monitored t.v time, what books they read, who their friends were, what they looked at on the Internet..... I wanted to keep them safe and teach them the importance of acting their age and enjoying the easy years.... Adulting is hard ..... I don't always want to be one lol... Five sounds like a perfect age ... Naps playing all day... You know the easy stuff lol.... However I am thankful that God allowed me to be a Mom....

    Now that they are older I find myself protecting them from even more than ever in a more serious manner.... I want them to,save themselves for marriage, choose wise friends, Pray God would lead them to The One He created just for her !!!! I want them to have a strong relationship with God , to know what He says is right and wrong! Trust me this world is not where I want them getting that info from... I want them to pray about what God has called them to do..... The list goes on for days I promise .... Are they perfect nope ... Are they going to make mistakes...YES ! Even though neither of them have ever done anything to horribly bad .... I realize this world has a lot more pressures for them as teens and young adults than there ever was when I was a kid ! I want them to know they can ask me anything! Tell me anything! Am I always gonna like it .... Ummm.... Nope, however I am sure Gods not always to happy with me either .... He never turns me away.... I recently heard a story of how when a young man was young he messed up,and the church and his family turned their backs on them... Now let me make this clear ! My kids have not done anything to prompt this blog post ! It's just what God laid on my heart ...

     I am a Pastors wife .... I honestly could never turn my back on some one because they sinned! Not now anyways .... I can remember being apart of a movement years ago you must look  and act a certain way or God wouldn't love you .... I am so glad God removed those blinders from my eyes ! He saved me washed dirty ole me up and loves me !!!! If He can do that for me ! He can and will for anyone who ask ! The problem is we have lost a whole generation because, we set our standard so high even for our children we have bacame unapproachable ..... Ohh my..... What if God was that way? 

    I'm so glad He isn't .... So as I prayed this morning .... In my heart I felt Him reminding me ....my our doing good at this Mom thing ! Your not perfect.... 

I thought for a moment and asked myself do my kids know they can tell me anything and know that they are always loved , always have a home, and always forgiven ..... Dad reminded me yes .... They do because right after heart surgery Jody and yourself set down and told them that.... 

       My oldest is 20 and my youngest now 16.... Some advice from a seasoned Mom.... It's Imporant she play's and is taught to be a kid and it's just as Imporant to teach them to be healthy teens, in their hearts minds and relationships .... Practice talking about the hard stuff... You want those talks to come from you not the world... You know the one I am thinking about .... Why it's important to save yourself for marriage .... Have an open rule you can go through their phone and computer .... Be sure to actually do it.... They may not tell you this right now! But they will love you for it in the end I promise ! Just remember this the Bible says this ....

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old he will not depart from it!

Moms you do the training don't let the world be their influence ....

 Praying for all of you ! Hope you have an amazing weekend ! 💜Shellie

Time for War

                      

Let's go to battle ! I had the honor and privilege to attend church this today !!!! I haven't yet returned to children's ministry, so I had the honor of attending worship up stairs !!! Ohh my and was it worth every ounce of energy and pushing myself to get there! The Pastor spoke today on the subject it's time for war! Ohh my was it amazing , but I must say it was for me !!! I have came to realize just a few days ago I am in a spiritual battle ! That is affecting my physical body! Devil would love for me to give up and quit fighting and proclaiming Gods promises .... Hate to tell him ... Not today or any day for that matter !!!! I have the letters from the King that proclaim my healing !!!! The Bible ! And guess what it can't lie .... 

   I don't know when that complete healing is coming ..... I just know it is and I will not stop proclaiming it and praising My Dad God for it !!! Not now not ever ! 

    I may have to be rolled in a wheel chair for now, but I will walk long distances again! My lungs will function properly again ! My heart will function properly again ! I know because My Dad (Jesus) has already revealed it in my spirit .... I love how He does stuff like that ! I have already given my shout of victory !!!! So what are you facing? Are you in a battle ? Please know God love you and He's got your victory He just wants you to stand until He gives the word !!!! Stand still and wait on Him ! It will be worth it !lean on the Lord when it's hard to stand He will give you strength to stand I promise !!! I'm praying for you this week coming ! I don't have to know your name cause God already does ! Praying your blessed this week !!!!! Thanks for stopping by !

I wanna always call out to my Jesus !

I have been reading the most amazing book by Beth Moore ! It's about David and the anointing God had placed on his life ... I ah e came to learn that the more God used David the more David faced! He was hunted down by a crazy man, hid away in a cave , all along he was separated from the womN he loves and his family .... Yet David never lost his focus on God ! 

             I want to be just like that .... No matter the adversary I may face I still want to shout out to Jesus and know He is there and He loves me ... I want to call out to Him even when I don't feel strong enough ! I have found over the past few weeks my favorite time to read my Bible and pray is when I wake up in the middle of the night in pain.... Jesus calms my body much faster than another round of pain medicine.... 

        I know in my heart not being able to walk very far is temporary ... I know I have been healed by the Word of God, I'm just waiting for my change!!! Yet this time last year if someone would have told me I would be planning to attend a  Women of Joy Confrence in Pigioen Forge Tn. In a wheelchair I would have told them they were crazy. Yet my God knew, I heard an amazing speaker Kathrine Wolfe tell her story last year on stage in a wheel chair ! Her story inspired me beyond words, now more than ever.... That no matter what God wants to use you ! He wants you to work for Him !!! 

    I have said from the time I woke up I wasn't missing this trip! I know it's ment for me in more than one way ! I know my new me for now has to strike fear to the ones I will be with.... I don't want to be a burden at the same time I don't want to miss my blessing ! I know God has great and mighty plans for me !!! 

    So instead of concentrating on the negatives, I am finding the positives .... Lifting any concern I have in prayers to the Lord .... I know He I has already gone before me and he's got this !!! I'm don't really know for sure who all reads my blogs.... I kinda like it that way lol.... But I would like to encourage you to get out of your comfort zone and reach out to someone who is different than you .... Remind them that just because they are different that You love them for who God has created them to be know matter what makes them different ... I have always taught my children to love everyone no matter who they were and to show kindness... Go out of your way to show them that despite of what they are facing they are still very much apart of the world they live in ... They just get to experience it in a different way than you ! I love my Jesus and I am thankful for every trial I have faced for its made who I am.... I want to be like David constantly calling on my Dad know matter what's going on in my life !!! I know He's just waiting for me to call out so He can remind me He's got it ....

Because God is not the Author of destruction ..., so He's not trying to destroy me!

God will repay evil done to me !

My hope must be in God !

No matter how bad things look, God is good !!!!!

Friends....

   

                      

Wow today has been a big day ... I may or may not have over did it .... I still can not walk a long distance .... That's okay it's coming... It is, My God has my miracle! I am praising Him for it ! 

     I have managed to stand in the kitchen and prepare breakfast, lunch, and supervise supper! By the time supper came along well my legs were so week and my breathing labored.... So I had to set... And we'll ask for help! So my two helpers my youngest and my daughter from another Mommy prepared dinner for our family tonight ! They did amazing! I am so proud of these girls, there really is a difference in homeschool kids... I know I am partial, however they are so eager to learn and help ! 

       We have decided today I may need to see a cardioigist ! So my hubby will make the call tomorrow! My foot is swelling more, tingly, and still really cold ... All though my breathing is some better I am still having chest pains. So I will keep you updated ! 

   So to the subject of the title for my blog today ! I have met many people over the years ! Many friends come and gone.... Some have stayed through thick and thin and I thank you for that! Then you have the new ones Gods has placed in your life ! I must say when we packed up a up haul and moved back to our home town a two years ago we came broken.... We knew we were in Gods complete and total will! We were doing exactly as God told us and stepped out on total faith ! When we arrived and were voted in as the new Pastors family 2wks later of Dunn's Mountain Baptist Church. I must say I went in guarded and not sure I would ever let any one breach the the walls, I had put around my heart .... I had been hurt and wasn't sure I wanted to allow some one else into my small circle of friends !!! 

I really wasn't sure I could allow my heart to be hurt again!

     Just let me say , I am so very glad God placed the amazing ladies in my life that He has, and that He opened my heart at all the right times ! I have made some amazing connections here . Some are like sisters, some are like my bestie here, and some are friends that can't be replaced. These ladies have impacted my heart so very much ! Now let me say this I am not in the business of replacing friends! If your my bestie at any point you always hold that place in my heart ! I truly believe God sends who we need for every season of our life ! That is very true for today as well ! The friends I have made here are amazing ! They have called, texted ,visited , and most importantly prayed for me! Even just today I had an amazing surprise visit ... It want expected and I adored every moment of it! That's medicine for the soul! I am so thankful for it.... 

     We all need a friend someone who knows the story of our hearts, who can cry with, laugh with, someone who hold us accountable, and most importantly love and pray for us..... 

    There have been seasons I haven't had a friends because needed me to need just my family... Then there are those times that I have had friends and my children have not or vise versa .... I have found no matter what season , My Dad (Jesus) cared and sent what each of us needed at just the time we needed them most ! Just like today ... I needed that surprise visit ... It was medicine for the soul... It lifted my spirits in more than one way !!! So tonight I want to thank Jesus for all my friends !!! Some hold a very special place in my heart they know the me that some never know! I am so blessed to have that!!! I want you each to know you are some of the most beautiful flowers in my life's garden and I'm so very thankful for you .... I love you beyond words, and I pray for you often! 

I would like to close with this scripture from the Word of God tonight :

A friend loveth at all times, Proverbs 17:17King James Version (KJV)

Thank you for stopping by ... I am praying for each of you ... I hope you have a blessed evening .... Be sure you tell those who are special to you that you love them! 

Not what I wanted to hear....

    

                                    

Today has been a long eventful day again ... After the returning of the fever and excruciating pain my hubby made a Drs appointment for today... I tried to argue but well it didn't do any good at all... 

 I didn't figure the news would be exactly what I wanted to hear ... But I wasn't prepared for what he had to say either... So the fever, excruciating pain when I breathe, severe shortness of breathe, and fatigue are coming from the heart condition pericarditis .... So we added two more medicines to the growing list. Then my sweet dr told me this wasn't going away anytime soon ... If I don't have any improvements in 7 days I will need to see a cardiologist ! We are looking at the end of May before we know just what to expect from my heart.... 

    That's not what a 38 active women wants to hear.... I have lost all quality of life .... Since March first... Well life as I knew it is better fitting ... Tomorrow will mark one month exactly ! 

So as I have looked back over this month these are the things I have learned from all this ....

 Positivity is a must ... There is no room for negative thoughts ! My faith has grown even more because I know God has got this ! Goals are ment to be set and not met .... That's okay because some goals are just going to take a lil longer ! I am stronger than I give myself credit for.... I need my family on so many levels! I have the most most amazing husband and daughters in all the world!!! I can live in a one room apartment ! I have for a month now lol! However I do miss the big house .... It's okay to ask for help, it's not a sign of weakness it's actually a strength, I have grown so much closer to God ! Not all Drs are bad ! I still prefer natural medicine over modern but sometimes you need both.... I can be real creative on how to pass time when you are confined to one area all day! That I really do need coffee in my life in more way than one lol .... That no matter what the outcome Gods got this ! He is in control.... I have to take each day as it comes wether it's a easy or hard day .... 

Thats just some of my lessons .... I am sure by the time May gets here that list will surly have grown ... 

Even though I still understand why all this is happened ... As long as Hod gets glory that's all that matters .... So I will leave with scripture tonight ..... 

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.

Jeremiah 29:1 (KJV)

I am so glad He does.... Praying you have a blessed night .... Thanks for sharing this journey with me !

Taking a break !

   

                                    

Wow ! Sorry I missed a day and I'm so late posting !!!! The past two days have not been my best .... Yesterday was not good all day and left me nauseous from pain ... Woke up even today ! I have started running a fever again and to take a breathe causes excruciating pain .... So I will be going back to the doctor tomorrow ! 

    However last night I woke up several times and so I took that time to talk to my Jesus !!! During our talks, He revealed somethings to me ... Some was not easy to swallow ... Like how much time I spent on social media ... When I could be spending that time with Him... So I decided today to take a 21day social media fast ... Then I will go from there.... I have spent the time today I would have spent on social media reading a book! I loved every minute of it! Then I this evening I spent some time in Gods word and writing in my prayer journal ... I was so pleased with how much time I spent with the Lord today! I am super excited about how much I can grow and come to know my Jesus more! 

   He even reminded me myself worth is not found in my circumstance or others .... His change for me is coming I just have to trust Him! I won't lie my feelings had gotten kinda hurt some of the one I thought would keep in touch with me through all of this I haven't heard a word from.... Jesus reminded me that some people are only ment for a season.... Quit trying to keep what He has already closed the door on ... So I released those people to Him ....I love when the Lord already starts to heal ... What I feel is broken .... 

   My God is so amazing and so worthy of all my praise ! 

Well guys , my medicine is starting to kick in so , it is time to take of me and go to bed ! Thanks for stopping by ! I hope you all sleep well tonight and have a blessed day tomorrow !!!! 

 

Realities

    

                                                                              

                                        

Today has been an okay day .... I have felt very wiped out .... No real game changing activities today, to cause such a change.... I just don't feel good. Don't worry I haven't given up on my goals though! They are important ! I just haven't worked on all of them lol. 

I did start the morning with a very sweet visit with one of my dearest and closest friends and her princess! That's medicine for the heart and soul! It was just nice to have all that energy around me for a few hours! Her lil princess snuggled up on the chase with me and whispered about Disney, princesses, and babies! My favorites !!! She made me smile ! Today was a day of some realities though.... I had to get honest with myself with the limitations I am facing at the moment. It's the week before my youngest 16th Birthday ! Tomorrow I should be hosting a Once Upon A Time Formal Sweet 16 Birthday Ball! The plans are to die for and a dream any princess would love to have.... We had to cancel our initial date and try to reschedule... When we first rescheduled I just new things would have been more progressed than has ... I realized today that we will now have to put her ball off till Summer ....Now she is totally okay with this ... She has told me repeatedly all that matters is that I get better... My Mommy heart is not liking this... Birthdays have always been a grand celebration in our home.... 

It's just a new hurdle for me to wrap around my heart and mind. As I spent sometime in prayer earlier God reminded me all things will come in time.... He makes no mistakes in any delay.... Easter is also around the corner Reserection Sunday and Christmas are my favorite holidays !!! They mean so very much to me! I dawned on me I am not prepared for that either. I am not even sure I will be able to attend church Easter. My pastors wife's heart is having a hard time with that! I need to be there! I'm missing my lil people at church. So today I am reminded to take a deep breathe its temporary. God makes no mistakes . It will be okay in the end! My heart is going to have to allow others help do what I do! Knowing they can do it just as well as I can... 

So today's blog may not be as up beat as the others but, I promised to share my heart and my journey with you... This is where my journey is today.... I am trusting the Lord tomorrow will be better ... For He knows what my heart has need of .... So I will praise Him in the hallway for He is good !!!!

I will close today with this scripture ! It is fitting ... It was from my devotion this morning... Gods timing is perfect! 

 “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. 

Matthew 6:34 ESV 

Trying to Understand ......

It's been awhile since I blogged .... Life seems to keep me at a very face pace most days.... Leaving little time for blog post .... I have missed it! I have found myself with more time than I know what do with at the moment. 

On December 26,2015 I fell at the end of our driveway. I was trying to help my sweet hubby out, by pulling the trash can to the end of the drive way ! I hit a mud puddle and went flying ! I promise if someone seen they got the laugh of their life! I sprang my ankle and I really thought I had only sprang my knee. When almost a month went by and my ankle got better and my knee was worse. It lead to a series of doctors appointments. We would learn I had scuffed the cartilage on the outer part of the bone and knee cap causing rivets .... Also kinda cause a lil jagged edge to my meniscus. It would require a 20 minute arthroscopy to correct a few weeks to recover and I could return to a normal life with out crutches ! Ohh how I could not wait to ditch the crutches ! Even with all of that life was still constantly busy... As a pastors family comes with lots of demands and lots of trials of everyday life.... I was ready to not have to depend on my whole family to help me out with all they all ready had on their own plates ! I am one of those people who love to help others ! In the same token I struggle with asking for help ! 

It's crazy how things can change in the blink of an eye! The things we struggle with become what we need most ! 

On March 1,2016 I checked into out patient surgery for a knee repair. When I woke up from recovery my whole world had been turned upside down! During surgery I aspirated stomach acid into my left lung ! Causing chemical burns to my lung and my esophagus, I also suffered an injury to my heart causing pericarditis fluid on my heart. I haven't had a voice since I woke up beyond a whisper. I spent 7 days in the hospital! My small knee injury repair just turned into a nightmare. I will be the first to tell you My God Makes NO MISTAKES!!!! He will will give beauty for the ashes! So that's why I want to share this journey with you ! I do not want self pity or anyone to feel sorry for me ! My whole life as I knew it is changed at the moment ! I know it's temporary! But nothing is the same ! I am currently staying in our apartment that is attached to our home! I sleep setting straight up on a chase because my breathing is severely affected and I constantly feel like I am suffocating, I walk with the assistance of a walker and can only go a very short distance. Before my I am gasping for air, the fluid on my heart causes extreme chest pain, I need assistance having a shower, I have to set in a chair and it takes every ounce of strength I have ! My family has taken on all the things in our home I normally take care of ! We have had such an out pouring of love for my family through this !!! Our church has helped with meals, they have visited,called texted and made sure we have been taken care of. Not to mention our own family and friends who have been there !!!! One of the hardest things for me to hand off is my ministry work with the the kids ! I know it's okay thought because they are in very capable hands !!! Like I said my world I know it has changed entirely.... 

Now my list of things to get done for my family and church are scheduled Drs appointments. Keeping up with medicines. Waiting patiently for my change to come !

So I would like to keep a blog of Gods goodness through all of this ! I want others to know that even when we don't understand , God has a plan !!!! 

Today I want to share how this will forever change the way I see my husband !!!! As every marriage we have our fights! We are normal... These past few months had been a lil bumpy for us... But we were okay.... As a wife we all have to admit we take our husbands and our marriages for granted at times ! We are all guilty! Jody is an amazing man of God ! I am beyond proud to be his wife! I have already seen God use this to strengthen our marriage beyond words! Petty things that we think are so important are no longer that important! Like a spotless house, everything in order in life and ministry, the things that aren't even important enough to list. When tragedy happens all of that no longer is important. Instead the man who never left your bedside,still hasn't by the way ! He slept in the recliner at the hospital and sleeps on the couch beside the chase every night to make sure he can hear me if I need him ! He helps me bathe, dress, waits on my every need. Never once has he complained! Even when I can see he is so tired he can hardly go, he never complains! He's my king ladies !!! I have seen the love of Jesus through this man in so many ways ! He prays with me encourages me !!! Reminds me that no matter what it's okay Gods got this! I am reminded every time I look at him our love is so much more than what you can see. It does not matter if everything is falling apart around me Gods love and Jody's love makes what seem impossible possible !!!! I am so blessed to call this man mine ! I will close today's blog with a few lyrics from a song my sweet hubby shared with me before he had to return to work today.... I could tell it was a struggle for him to decide on what was best for him to do ! My sweet girls are looking after their Mom while he has to be gone ! However before he left he shared this song he heard last night while listening to TD Jakes... After we listened to it together and silent tears fell.... He joined me on the chase and wrapped his arms around me and prayed with me! These words are my testimony !!!! I will praise God in the hallway till I see it come to pass then I will shout it for all to hear! "Yes I am healed by the WORD of GOD! It's already done! I'm just waiting for my change to 

come!" 

God created Jody and I for each other !!! He made no mistake! Be sure to let your hubby know you love and appreciate him 💕

So if you think about it lift my family up in prayer ! Gods got this! 

     

Wow sorry it's been so long ! Yikes

                                                                                

                                                                                                                                                           

                                          

Where has the time gone ! I didn't even realize it had been that long ! I'm so sorry ...My I have had lots going on ! I started my book I am so excited ! I love what I have so far ! I haven't really kicked off my sewing completely .... I did a t shirt quilt and some memory bears ! Then I got really sick ! I have been on  bed rest for about a month all together then had my appendix removed ! Gods been good through it all, surgery was a scary thought for me !  He seen me right through and now I'm on the road to  recovery ! Slow going but getting there !!! I had forgotten how much I love blogging ! 

     It's almost that time here homeschool time ! We have already picked out out curriculiam for this year and if the mail cooperates it will be here by Saturday ! I am excited with our choices and ready to get lesson plans together! Crazy thing our official start date is weeks away ! We are taking a much needed family vacation in September ! I can't wait !!!! It's seems like it's been forever since we unplugged and just enjoyed being together ! When we return we start our school adventures !!! I plan to blog our way thru our school year this year ! It makes me accountable lol ! We have always done school our own way and I love it !!!! I would not want it any other way !!!! So remember us in prayer ! I'm excited about sharing this journey with you !!! Blessings and love Shellie💜

Gods Showing Me What's Next

                                                                             

  

 A little over a month ago, I shared I had been praying about what God would have me do next ! After talking to my Heavenly Dad and sweet hubby about it! I am excited to say that I know in my heart what is to be next ! For years I have dreamed of a doll boutique ! A lil shop all of my own filled with my creations ! Although that part may not come for awhile ! However I do plan to start my own online website in the near future and sell 18 inch doll clothes and accessories! I am so excited that even my hubby confirmed that I am always happiest when I sew what I love ! I love to create for 18 inch dolls! That wasn't all that God showed me though ! I am going to attempt to write a book ! That part is still a secret because it won't be what most think it will be ! However I am super excited about this step into my future ! I know God has great plans for me ! 

So all who would please keep me in your prayers ! God is good and I am so thank full for his blessings!

Dreaming .....

But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.  

Mathew 9:26

 I recently shared with my husband something's .... Well I haven't shared before .... Dreams .... Things I would like to do ! 

     I know it sounds silly, in some ways ... I have a very busy life ! My family unit and our ministry are to priorities over all ! I can't help but feel the talents God has given each of us ... Well he wants us to use them ! 

     So I asked my sweet husband to pray for me ! As I seek God and use those talents ... 

    For years I have found extreme pleasure in sewing !!! It is like therapy for my soul ! Lately I have thrown the idea around of making custom  boutique kids clothing to sell online ... 

     Also praying about finishing my book about my life .... This one is tough for me! It's a scary thought to let people in again! 

    Lastly a tea room ! I would love to host tea parties for special events !!!! 

      I know these are dreams right now ! I am praying the Lord guides my heart !

     I have been a homeschool stay at home Mommy for 17 yrs now ! It's hard to imagine that journey will soon be over ... In just a few short years ! 

My babies are growing up fast !!! I am so proud of the young women they are !!! They will ever know the joy they give me daily .... 

     So for now these are prayers and dreams as I follow the Lords leading .... So I will ask you to do the same ... Pray for me .... It's in those still quite moments of the still mornings .... I love to share my heart .... Not only share but listen for my Dad to speak and guide my foot steps ...

Hope each of you have an amazingly blessed day ! 

💜 Shellie .....

God is never late ....

I woke before my family did this morning ... We have a very busy day ahead of us ... I wanted to make sure I had time to spend with the Lord , before I was consumed with other responsibilities ! As I sat down to do my devotion the words have never been more fitting ! Bone-weary , exhaustion ,and to much for you !!! What did my sweet Lord tell my secret prayers !!!! I know He didn't my heavenly Dad would never do such a thing ... However He knew what I needed , I am thankful ! I know I am on His path , make no mistake about that !!!! I just need a little reminder sometime that He is still with me during this battle !!! I am thrilled to know He is !!! I don't ever want to be so busy that I am not attentive to Him ! I know He's guiding each of my steps !!! I think for awhile I will just crawl up in Daddy's lap and let Him carry me awhile ! I am blessed to know He will !!! For in His presence there shall always be peace !!!

Hope each of you have a blessed weekend ! Blessings 💜Shellie

Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God. Psalm 42:11

Tail Spinning Thoughts

What a title I know !!! Yet it stands very true for me ! I have this ability to have 50 million things going through my head and set them aside to do something else ! With the intention to return to them and think them through or shut them off !!! Problem is I I often forget to do just those two simple things !!!! 

   So instead of the 50 million I woke up with I go to bed to add more the next morning !!!! Only to find myself very overwhelmed !!! As I was doing my devotion this morning I wasn't shocked to read that the Lord had the perfect solution ! Why wasn't I giving them over to Him ? Even if it does need my attention He still wants me to include Him! After all He isn't surprised by them , He knows they are there ! He just isn't going to make me include Him !!! My problem is I'm a very creative person so I tend to be all over the place , I can be doing school and see a milk jug and think of how to turn it into a awesome basket and still be on task .... Yet in my little mind I see no need to let God handle it such an unimportant thought ! After all He is God and He is busy curing cancer He doesn't care about my project ! However He does !!!! You know He created me, thats why I am who I am !!! So of course He wants me to share !!!!i guess my point is that we are all guilty of letting our thoughts get out of control ! Wether they are are good or bad thoughts ! We often think of ourselves as super human who needs to handle everything on our own ! Here is how my devotion started " Keep your focus on Me. I have gifted you with amazing freedom , including the ability to choose the focal point of your mind. Only the crown of My creation has such remarkable capability ; this is a sign of being made in My image ! 

I choose to make God my focal point , not to let my thoughts spin out of control, leading to frustration , overwhelmed , and spinning out of control ! I am after all made in Him image !!!  I should take pride in that and Him .... So I choose to share all things with Him even petty things !!! With Him all things are possible !!! Even calming the storms of my mind !!!! 

Blessings 💜Shellie

But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.

Mathew 19:26

Trusting my Lord ❤️

Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

Deuteronomy 31:6

I have spent a lot of time reflecting the past few days ! As I have enjoyed my blessed week ! January 21st is such a harsh day for my heart ... It marks the anniversary of my Mommaw going home & the birthday of the little boy we were going to adopt ... He is five now .... It has never bothered me as much as it did this year !!! Unfortunately it has been a wave of emotions this year ! We lost the adoption in the moms 8 month .... Nursery was ready , we were ready to bring him home .... I must remind myself Gods knows best ! We often plan our lives even when we knew God was in is agreeing to adopt! He changed the plan ! It's often rough on us when God changes up His plan ... As the years have passed I have realized why God changed the plan around... He seen things I could not ! But know now ....Thay reminds me to be strong and courages !!! Because He is always with me!!!! God is good even when He changes His mind ! He had my interest in mind ! He will never leave me or forsake me !!!! He knows the plans , I'm so willing to follow ! How about you !!!! Blessings 💜Shellie 

When Everything we Try seems it isn't working !

 And  he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.

Luke 9:23

We all go through those times in our lives, when everything we touch or try just doesn't seem like it's working !!! I have been there countless times !!!! Some of you may be there now !!!! I have found more times than not , we are spinning our wheels ! The reason why is because all to often we forget to ask our our heavenly Dad if it's what He wants ! I know that sounds silly , but it's true ! For instance it's that time of year again everyone is wanting to diet ! Either that want to be healthier or they need to loose weight ! I cringe when I read I want to loose such and such by such and such date ! Here's another good one to consider I believe I will change the way I do things because so and so said I need to change things up ! Let me ask some questions ! First have you really spent time talking to our heavenly Dad about it ? Have you asked Him if that's the order He have you do things ? When it come to diets have you talked to Your Heavenly Dad and your hubby ? More times than Not the answer to that is no !!! It ends up leaving us frustrated and over whelmed ! You see It's important to talk to our hubby's ! I have seen  countless marriages  crumble from this mistake !!! You think one way well he has another thought ! Trust me it worth talking to him about it ! my sweet hubby tells me all the time I am beautiful ! I thank him for that !!! I recently expressed I really needed to go back to a healthier life style ! This is how he responded ! I think you are beautiful as you are and I don't think you need to loose weight ! Yet we should eat healthier and be more active ! That made my heart skip a beat !!! I know a few men who would never compliment their wives ... Instead tell them they could stand to loose a few pounds ! As we talked we discussed with our girls it was for health reasons ! Not diets ! That being healthy didn't mean becoming bean polls lol ! If weight loss comes great, if not I know my hubby is attracted to me !!!! I'm ever greatful for that !!! I have found when I change other things it helps when I talk to him and Dad about them as well ! When he helps me pray about it and we talk about it , often it helps make the process easier , when are both on board the same ship ! Trust me we have been on opposite ships before and it was anything but smooth sailing !!!!! When I did my devotion this morning it on these things ! I must say it truly hit home ! It made me think of times in my life when I didn't pray and just acted ! I was left spinning my tires ! Till finally I would realized this wasn't how my heavenly Dad wanted things ! Change is very hard ! No mater who you are ! It's even harder when you start to getting older ! I would truly advise anyone to spend time in prayer when your going to start changes talk to your hubby about it ! Remember your a team and when your cheering for the same things it sails much smoother !!! I'm glad Jesus never tires of my countless plans of change and He Has no fear to say no !!!!! That He is always there to help guide me when she says Yes !!! Are you spinning ?!?! If so take a step back talk to our heavenly Dad about it ! I promise you won't be disappointed !!! He so wants to be apart of all your aspects of life !!!! You will spend less time spinning and more time gaining new ground ! Praying you have an amazing week !!! 💛Shellie 

When to be quiet ....

21 

21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.

Proverbs18:21

This I must say has never been a second nature for me ! I'm quick to speak if asked .... Sometimes that's a really good thing other times not so great ... I have been working on not reacting when upset for sometime now , I guess about a good year .... After someone I never thought would accuse me of something they knew wasn't true out of their anger .... I'll never forget those hot tears as they ran down my face .... All the years I had worked to show I was no longer that person was stipped away at that moment .... I remember being so upset I screamed I quit ! I am done ! No more ! I'm tired of being nice and sharing and getting trampled on all because I'm who a , "pastors wife "! My husband tried his best to soothe my brokenness .... He tried to make their wrong right .... He had to leave for awhile and he hadn't been gone long when the phone rang ! Much to my surprise the voice on the other line was who I needed right at that moment ! That Man of God will never know how his words changed my life !!!! This is what've said " it's okay to be angry sis , their words cut deep , but don't use words to hurt them back" ! Stand stonger than them ! Because you will always remember how their words made you feel , they will never forget how you didn't break ! After this mornings devotion I needed to remind myself of this ! Guys our tongues , have the power of life and death in them ! What we say about others to them and behind their backs can sometimes be the straw that breaks a camels back ..... We should speak life when we speak of someone or not speak at all and pray about it ! I went to bed upset woke up upset . So I wouldn't speak harsh words to my teenage daughter ! See we all have been young and known it all at some point .... Often we just need to let them live and learn .... Im trying to set an example .... 

Words have a lasting affect a stigma you could say .... For instance if you constantly talk abou yourself as fat and ugly. No matter how small you are and beautiful you are .... You will never see yourself that way ! Now I am trying to do some life changes right now healthier ones .... You won't hear diet , fat , or ugly out of my mouth.... Here is why ! I am fearfully and wonderfully made ! I may need some fine tuning but God made me beautiful exactly the way I am ! I am not suppose to be my sixteen year old self forever lol ! I'm okay with that ....so my prayer is that my words speak life not death ! Also not to allow those who speak those deadly words against me have any ground to stand on ! If your not good for me , I don't need you ! So let's use our tongues to speak life to those around us ! Like our Momma's taught us "if you can't say nothing nice don't say nothing at all"!  Praying each of you have a blessed day ! 💜Shellie

Only time .....

It's taken me all day to muster up the courage to blog .... I still haven't felt well ... That wasn't it though .... Today marks a very hard day .... It's hard to believe this time 2 yrs ago I was making my way to West Virgina ... After a phone call from my sister Jackline .... I'll never forget how the call began ... Shellie I don't want to upset you ! Then there was a pause ... That was followed by I just received a call Laurie (my oldest sister ) had been un responsive for thirty minutes and they had revived her she was on a reparatior! I needed to come .... The days leading up to this was beyond belief ! We had talked really talked for the first time in years !!!we had laughed , cried , shared memories.  & most of all told one another how proud we were of each other .... That wasn't something that normally came easy for us ... We had a strained relationship for many years ... Life had not always been kind .... Choices made things worse ... However on Christmas Eve she called and told me she had accepted Jesus as her Savioir !!!! I was on top of the world !!! We let things that plagued is go .... Several days later our Uncle died ... She was beside herself .... She asked me 4 times to come home !!! She needed to see me ! I just couldn't .... I couldn't go for many reasons .... 5 days later I would make that trip any ways .... I never thought the last conversation we had telling each other how proud we were to be each other's sister would be the last time I would hear her say bean I love you ! Always remember that okay ..... 

  I have lost many through the years ... Nothing prepared me for this loss ... I felt like when I saw her on that bed apart of me was laying there with her .... Left with her the next day .... When she left this world for her heavenly home.... She never woke up .... She never responded to our voices or touch .... She was a shell that was empty it seemed ... I'll never ever forget before the decision was made to turn the machine off ... We all gathered by her bed and sang .... She was always so full of life and loved to sing ... She had the voice of an angel .... I couldn't help but think she was singing now .... Maybe not with us !!! Yet at the feet of Jesus !!! With The one just days before have her a new life and a promise of eternal life just days before!!! I couldn't help but think how lucky she was .... Today marks 2 years .... Much has happened .... Even though in some ways it's easier ... In others it's not ... I'm not sure your heart ever gets over loosing someone we love .... I think we will always miss their presence ... Especially during the holidays ... Anniversary and of course Birthdays .... Today a thought crossed my mind ... Tomorrow marks her eternal birthday !!! Meaning I will see her again , I will hear her sing , laugh , feel her hug me once more , and most excitedly hear her call me Bean !!!!! I know there will be days that are harder than others , I know Jesus understands after all He cried when He heard the news of Lazzareth ... So I know he understand my hurting heart ... I wasn't shocked when my devotion matched my aching heart this morning ! That's just how amazing my God is !!! He's always on time !!!! So I will leave you with a thought and some scripture ! Always make time to make. Memory , take pictures even if you don't want too , forgive quickly , and always say  I love you !!! You never know when it will be your last time !!!! I'm glad I did those things with Laurie before she went home .... I want to leave you with this scripture John 16:33 says :

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Im glad that with Jesus there is peace !

Many Blessings Shellie 

My sweet sissy when I was 16 !!! This one of my favorite pictures of her 💜

A Teachable Spirit

.... I awoke with a fever and the crud again !!!! I was so frustrated ... I have so many things to do .... Take tree down, clean house, prepare to start school back, prepare for ministry meetings , and the list goes on !!!! So after breakfast and a hot bath I set in the couch .... Wandering why on earth did I have this stuff again ! Then when I asked Jody to bring my devotion book I caught a glimpse of why possibly .... My devotion came from Romans 12:2 Do not be conformed to this world,[a] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

I started an amazing devotional by Sarah Young Jesus Calling ! The very first sentence was , "come to Me with a teachable spirit , eager to be changed ...

It was then I realized ,that I have me best talks with God when I feel bad ... Because there is nothing to distract me !!!! I want to always have a teachable spirit .... To learn from my Heavenly Farher daily !!!! Today's lesson was just this .... Sometimes His plans aren't my own.... I need to slow down take care of my body , the chores will be there tomorrow or when I feel better , meetings can be rescheduled , but time alone with Him comes everyday .... To learn what adventure with Him is next !!!! It's sure to be amazing ! He never fails to offer hope ... Love or grace ! He also never makes. Mistake .... So the couch for me it is today ..... I have already learned so much from my teacher today .... I'm so blessed to call Jesus mine !!!! I would like to leave you with a scripture to think about toady ... For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare[a] and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 

I pray you too trust Jesus with your plans ... Hope everyone has a blessed day !!! Happy New Year !!!! Praying your 2015 is filled with blessing , hope , joy , love , and of course lessons from the Master ....

Shellie